coming closer to me from there,
leaving me from here.
scared, reluctant, pulsing heart...
what is to be said?
hate.
love.
will it flow in disfunctional direction?
or will it swirl
in a whirlpool of destruction?
sporadically scattered on varying levels.
who can ever answer questions
such as these but your god?
do i even try to compete
with the all-knowing bitch?
bitch of school.
learned.
overwhelming.
powerful.
why me?
will it be what i think i want?
hell is too close.
heaven?
i may not wait forever.
i just want a small taste
for savoring.
just one time.
for myself.
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